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You are here: Opinions Horoscope Guide to the stars WEEK OF Jan. 8 – Jan. 14

Guide to the stars WEEK OF Jan. 8 – Jan. 14

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A New Moon phase enters Capricorn this month and Mercury is in retrograde. Madame G suggests staying away from the computer and possibly all electronics. Take a lesson from the goal-oriented sign and head outside. You can enjoy winter’s crisp, clear, wind while you’re at it.


Aries (March 21-April 19)

Aries you’re at it again. What will break first, your head, or the wall your banging it against? Give yourself a break. Like the tenacious and strong-willed goat, the ram runs straight into danger and challenges without thought. They walk straight down 90-degree inclines and balance on the edge. Face your challenges head on. You’re built for action.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

There’s a company that sells actual bull excrement in a neat package with the image of a bull stamped on it. It’s not fertilizer – it’s bullshit in a box. Consider your words, for they may come back to haunt you, both literally and figuratively. Either that, or learn to package what you sell in a neat little package. Madame G suggests checking your packages for odd smells.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

Did you know that Gemini’s are the sign most likely to be a serial killer? Sometimes Earth and Air signs conflict over simple issues of ideology. But, don’t forget that your imagination often runs away with you. This makes you great at parties and unreliable in the boardroom. Reflect upon your New Year’s goals and don’t lose your head, or be the reason someone else loses theirs.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

As you emerge from hibernation give yourself some credit. You may require a little more care than usual. The skin is always tender after a molting. Pamper yourself within reason. Get the body geared up and ready for adventure. Remember the sage advice from airplane safety: if you want to help others – you must first help yourself.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

Tender is the night. You may feel a bit underwhelmed at times, but it’s a good idea to practice patience. You’re wise and kindhearted most of the time. But that doesn’t mean you’re always right. Wise men are fools who listen. It’s easy to give up and move on, but courage requires perseverance in the face of failure.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Tender Virgo, how does your garden grow? With work, work, work. No doubt you’re the master. You’ve got the nitpicking down and you’re ready for more. Your exterior usually shouts “whatever” while your inner soul screams in turmoil begging for help. People might surprise you. Reach out when you need it. We’re all in this world together.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct.22)

Your airy side makes you a perfect friend until things get serious and murky. Then you run for the heels on steroids. This is not altogether wrong. However, be aware that the more serious and introverted signs don’t appreciate false compassion. Here’s your challenge Libra, if someone burdens you unnecessarily let them know it. Their reaction might surprise you in a nice way. And if it doesn’t, you’ve done yourself a favor.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

You’ll appreciate the goal-oriented influence of the goat this week. Mercury is in retrograde and this may mean that your incredible will power may be diverted to other areas. But, this could be positive. Use your calm librarian voice to pacify the scene for an elderly bleeding diabetic. Rescue a puppy instead of editing. The possibilities are endless.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

Okay, you’re not quite battle ready. But, you will be. Focus your mind and hone those skills. Practice some meditation and try for calm and focused energy. You’re the pack leader NOT a puppy. If you can get her to use the bathroom outside you might just be able to do anything.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

This is your time. Don’t forget it. Use that determination on yourself. You and Madame G know that you could climb a mountain barefooted with the sheer force of your will. But, you’re not made of metal. Flesh and blood requires rest and food. Liquid diets of coffee and alcohol really don’t count. Start fresh this year.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Plato suggested crawling out of the cave to see the light. This is true of you too. Ignorance can take on many forms. Sometimes, the ones who’re busy proving the ignorance of others really reveal their own. Use better judgment and listen to those around you. They might just be telling you to duck, instead of looking up as a football smacks you in the face. Heads up!

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

It’s a Brave New World and you’re feeling a bit lonely. So, don’t forget self-care. But that doesn’t always mean spending money. Head out and take the dog for a long walk. Make new friends and show them your kind and beautiful side. Exercise is never a bad idea either. You’ll probably be glad you did and your canine friend will too.