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guide to the stars WEEK OF Dec. 18 – Dec. 24

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Is Mercury in Retrograde? Nope. It’s you. Lately it seems as if something is wrong with the universe. Everyone is working against you and humanity. Is it the stars or are people just crazy? Have no fear Madame G is here to keep the paranoia at bay mostly.


Aries (March 21-April 19)

Bored? Patience is a virtue, but not...

Guide to the stars WEEK OF Dec. 4 – Dec. 10

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Well, the numbers are in and you’re broke. You blew your winnings and bank account on Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and to feel like a better person—Giving Tuesday. Madame G suggests sipping tea before reviewing the credit card damage. You can always pick up extra work doing surveys online. As they say: “keep calm and carry on.” Good luck!

Aries (March 21-April 19)

It’s best to use your head this month. Your agitation picks up and the restless bugs rush out. It might be time for a quick trip down south. San Diego is lovely this time of year. Drink your beers on the beach and stretch out your toes on the shore. Enjoy your time and let the sun cleanse your soul. It’s the perfect...

Guide to the stars WEEK OF Nov. 27 – DEC. 3

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Madame G suggests updating your passport. Black Friday is here to drain your last remaining dollars in the bank. Perhaps travel is in your future, as you take a break from the holidays and run away from relatives. It’s not you, they’re truly mad. But, it’s a mad world. Happy trails!


Aries (March 21-April 19)

You’re choking on untapped adventure. You wanted to grab your SO and run off into the sunset, instead of spending Thanksgiving with the in-laws. But, the gods ignored your sacrifices. Barcelona is lovely this time of year. Take a chance. Take a drive. The dog looks bored, you should take her on a walk while dreaming of the Mediterranean.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)


guide to the stars WEEK OF Nov. 20 – Nov. 26

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Madame G suggests tackling your Thanksgiving preparation early. The Sun enters Sagittarius on Nov. 22 and wanderlust settles into your bones. This is the house of freedom and intellectual pursuits. You may neglect a pie in the oven because you’re pining for adventure while you stare out at the falling snow. Happy cooking!

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Dear Aries, you’re feeling bold. You want to take on a few extra commitments this month. Maybe you get a job, adopt a dog, or opt for a new gym membership. Beware of taking on too much at once. Your gym membership could take a back burner to Holiday fun. Don’t sneak a bite of pie just because it’s cooling on the stove. Santa’s...

Guide to the stars WEEK OF Nov. 13 – Nov. 19

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Paraskevidekatriaphobia! It’s the fear of Friday 13. Madame G suggests breaking free of self-induced fear. Halloween is over and with the Sun in Scorpio, you don’t have time for nonsense. Dig deep into meaningless superstitions. “Only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” FDR. Live free!


Aries (March 21-April 19)

This month seems to pile up and get away from you, just breathe. All will be well, manage your emotions. Anxiety is a like a caged dog pacing back and forth. It’s trying to release energy. Don’t be a bad pet owner take your dog (anxiety) for a walk. Enjoy this incredible weather. Who knows, all that walking might just melt the pounds right off.

Taurus (April...

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